Barbie Loflin

At the end of last year while studying for a class series, I literally felt myself tap into something in God; somewhat like the nurse who is looking for a workable vein and finally hits it.In a very spiritually visceral sense, I believe that is what took place.I felt something surge in the Spirit when I touched on one simple point, that of hungering for all of God.I began to sense His voice speaking to my inner man and my pulse took flight, as I heard Him whisper through my Spirit… Do you really want to go There?

Yes, God, I automatically responded.But, in my mind, I was thinking… Oh, no you didn’t!You did not just go There!

For, you see, between He and I, There has been painstakingly predetermined.We have been talking about There for quite some time now.It has been a topic of much conversation and the source of plenteous tears.He has known my desire to go There, for it is He who has placed that hunger inside of my heart.There has always been the gravity point, the Bermuda Triangle of deeper spirituality.Some go There never to return, and those who do, well, it is their stories that fly under our Spirit radar and take out the defenses… the ones that protect us from deeper hungers and higher loves.

Let me whet your appetite and stir you just a bit about There. There is a place in Him that consumes the breath and refills the lungs with God-Life.An illusive Atlantis that one speaks of but cannot walk upon, an aroma wafting past the nose, never to be recaptured.There both frustrates and entices.There is a place of intense spiritual intimacy and heart-pounding challenge, a place of more than we dream possible, but have always known exists.There is profound potential and deep grace, churning spiritual waters and personal revelation.There is where He becomes all and we become less… and less is the most glorious of goals.

I know, it makes no sense to the flesh, but oh, in the Spirit, it is a kid-in-the-candy-store kind of arrival.It’s all There, everything God has to offer and I can scarce make a decision as to what to taste first.

Oh, friend, I feel like He is taking me on the journey of a lifetime.I get this sense that I just cannot move fast enough.It is like searching for someone in a game of midnight flashlight tag.You know what you are looking for is just around the next tree, the next corner and your heart races at the thought of that uncharted encounter.

That is where I am at this point and time in my pursuit of There, my pursuit of Him.I know He is There… even though I have found Him here.I know He is calling. I feel an enormous sense of anticipation, a woeful groaning of Spirit laced with joyous pain-song, the highs and lows of searching with full expectation of finding and no time frame of doing so.

God said when we seek Him with our whole hearts, He will be found.Ah and that, yes, that is the challenge, is it not; that whole heart business?For, we know with absolute certainty that all of our heart is not available.There is much heart-space offered to lesser gods and smaller pursuits, mundane and trivial holdings, trite servitude to thief lords, leaving us to seek Him with partial hearts, and find Him in part only.

And now, fellow travelers, we must determine if here is enough, or if There is worth the labor of un-dividing our hearts.